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Dawn Rising

by Dawn Rising

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1.
Crushed 04:32
lyrics
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this is just a wreck this is just a big mistake i might have to find myself again but i know its much too late i have been afraid of things that i don't know i've been crying for an hour i really wanna go back home i wanna make myself believe that this was just a test that everything i said and did only happened in a dream but i know it's real i know it's real and that is clear but maybe you and i can start our life together i don't have any words i'm much too cynical to speak maybe you can say it first and give me sweet relief i've never had this kind of thing before in all my life and after everything i know that i might have to see it die but i'm gonna hold onto this now like it's the only thing i've got because it's the only thing i've got it's the only thing i've got
2.
Gone Spirits, Pt. 2 09:39
lyrics
i've been slowly losing my patience i've been patiently awaiting that cuz i've sewn the seeds since the last time you checked in it's been a little bit different a little bit better you could say a little bit better but you don't just recover from a thing like that and i'm still drowning and i'm still sinking in it and there's that fucking feeling again, still there, still there i know if i could i'd wash it all away i'd wash it all away, i'd wash it all away would you care if i'm dead can't help these thoughts spinning over my head i said would you care if i'm dead can't help these thoughts spinning over my head i said would they care if i'm dead can't help these thoughts spinning over my head i said would you care if i'm dead can't help these thoughts spinning over my head and it's making me ill and it's making me feel like i can never go back and i can never be healed cuz every step that i take, another wound is revealed and every smile i get, i'm gonna doubt if it's real so would you care if i'm dead can't help these thoughts spinning over my head i said would you care if i'm dead can't help these thoughts spinning over my head yeah, it's changed a lot now how the fuck does that feel? and you can't see me the same way now how the fuck does that feel? said that was the end of that and i'm certain it's a wrap now i'm certain it's a wrap and i know there's no going back but i thought i had a future i thought i saw the sun i thought i knew the goddess but the goddess was no one there's never that chance to redeem there's only the life in the wake and i'm here to find the best in that but its only a comparative thing and i'm still searching and i've got a heart to find but there's that fucking feeling again, still there, still there i know if i could i'd put my life in your hands i'd put my life in her hands, i'd put my life in her hands but i don't trust me quite enough to love me so i don't think of it and i won't discuss it cuz i can't allow myself to ever think that i was ever right in anything i did or anything i said that might've cut the wrong way and i can tell i still don't try i can tell that i still lie and i can tell i don't act right but if you want it from me you're gonna have to take it because i am who i am and you're not gonna make me regret it i've found people who i trust in life i believe in love now, and i see the light but when the feeling hits, it's like a constant fight because there's something in me that is dark as night but it is not an illness, no it is a guest cuz i remember when i fucking let it in and gave it shelter from the winter and shelter from the pain but if you want it from me you're gonna have to take it because i am who i am and you're not gonna make me regret it everything i ever want to have this fucking monster rips it from my broken hands but you son of a bitch, you can't take my love! no you son of a bitch, you can't take my love! and if you want it from me i'm never gonna let you have it because i'm finally happy with something i've got and i'm not gonna give it away not now! not ever! not now! not ever! not now! not ever! not now! not now! it's feeling like i'm getting torn apart like something is deep inside me and it wants to burst right out and i think i'm not strong enough to stop it but i don't know when and i don't know how and there's that fucking feeling again, still there, still there i know if i could i'd let it have its way i'd let it have its way, i'd let it have its way but i'm so scared i know something's in there and i know it's coming i just don't know when but it's coming and it's gonna be loud it's gonna be loud
3.
Another Sad Song 04:54
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and now i hope that i don't neglect to mention before i ever could've started, i didn't beat depression and i'm trying and i'm trying to make you understand but it's a false hope if you ain't already there i swore that this would be the last time i hid but now i can't bear to see that it is happening again and though i'd love for you to know and i'd love to say that i am ready for you now, transmission's on the way i'm running out of time to have you on my mind this signal has to break it's far too much to take for all that i am worth i'm not the only one who's hurt all else has gone away now time is ours to waste i never really thought about this much i only acted on my instinct and it just was not enough now i have to take the time to recollect and i think i'm unprepared for what i know is coming next cuz this isn't the first time i'm here i've been scraping at the same damn wall so many years and if i ever prove to make it all the way i'll be too overwhelmed to take the sun so i can never say words are written all along the page and i could never find the way to make the best of them far too long and now become erased i never meant to waste all of the opportunity all i hope is i can see the day and i've been searching for it far too many times i just want these sad songs to go away i just want these sad, sad songs to go away i was not ready to be left alone and i really did not want that part of me to show this has never been a secret but you've got to know i never meant to tell the world that i intended to go but i really needed to vent cuz i really needed a break and i never got to relax but now i'm starting to think that if only i had told you where i really was at we might've found our way out, but it's far too late for that i'm running out of time to have you on my mind this signal has to break it's far too much to take for all that i am worth i'm not the only one who's hurt all else has gone away now time is ours to waste and now i see it all a different way but it's not possible to write it down and make it all seem sane and i wonder if it's worth it to regret because i know that it's not something i am going to accept cuz this isn't the first time i'm here i've been scraping at the same damn wall so many years and if i ever prove to make it all the way i'll be too overwhelmed to take the sun so i can never say words are written all along the page and i could never find the way to make the best of them far too long and now become erased i never meant to waste all of the opportunity all i hope is i can see the day and i've been searching for it far too many times i just want these sad songs to go away i just want these sad, sad songs to go away don't go away, don't go away don't go away, don't go away don't go away, don't go away don't go away, don't go away don't go away, don't go away don't go away, don't go away don't go away, don't go away don't go away, don't go away
4.
Hollow Rings/Distance 03:31
info
5.
Geneva on the Lake 05:54
lyrics
woke up with a pounding in my head i don't know what brought me here, but i'd be better dead everyone in this cold town has a heart made of ice they've been beaten down by the very same things that i will face in life you know i used to know you back then, but i sure don't know you now however the fuck i got here, i've got to get myself out i've seen all i need to see, i've heard all i need to hear and i can feel my apocalypse drawing ever near some time ago i failed to make decisions and i still am strangled in them, but i don't think you want to know all you've got to do is buy me the ticket out and i swear that i'll forgive this once i forget it all back home you have no place to speak, you don't even know me and i don't want your help, i don't want your advice this is all a mistake, i am performing an act and i should be dead by now but i am alive i am alive i am alive i am still alive and you wanted to make me happy, i'm afraid there's no chance of that i've buried my mind in abstractions and i won't be taking it back but i am alive i am alive as we drive into the country, it's all burned out stars and we all know i'm dead weight dragging down this car and i laugh at jokes that i don't even think are funny i just need to break the tension before my patience can outrun me you remind me of that time when all my cards were in line i knocked them out of order and tried to put it out of mind geneva-on-the-lake, we saw a waterspout on lake erie and all that chaos, all that fear reminded me i'm alive i am alive i am alive i am still alive and i hope that you understood my distance, but if you only knew that everything's wrong, and there's been times i've thought of killing myself too but I am alive i am still alive and i'm never coming back here i am never coming back i see my chance up ahead i see my chance
6.
Tell Me the Fucking Truth, You Cowards 03:58
lyrics
any chance to strike the hammer, they're doing it all for fun the cops all say to run, the cops all say to run got 'em all like clay pigeons, to shoot 'em with your guns the cops all say to run, the cops all say to run innocence and violence are not too far apart the hunter and the hunted and the hunter takes the heart glad you could speak your mind on what you can't relate you can beat us in the dirt and make us all straight evil games you seek to play, can't believe you see it that way spin it, spin it, spin it all those things i thought i knew now have been confirmed by you spin it, spin it, spin it i hadn't thought about this much, didn't notice that your crutch was leaning on denial, spin it, spin it you wouldn't want me to call this hate, but i'm not blind to what you say when you're waiting on the strong arm to make us all straight just tell me the truth
7.
...rain_mural... (or out) 00:56
info
8.
Let's See the City 08:11
lyrics
tonight there'll be a show downtown where we can turn our malaise around just one more chance to open up i'll stay true to you if you show up we'll look so perfect there, we'll stave off all the stares and just for one more night, we'll have it all, i swear and gone are my demands so perfect in this dance these years have been so hard so let's take a week to see the stars let's hide in this room and dance to tunes that only you and i would get caught dancing to and let's improve our mood, let's change our attitude and just for one more night, pretend the world improved and we'll hold each other so close i will never let you go if it all should die tonight i'll see myself in your golden light i'll follow you down i'll follow you down to where it all will break away and even on these final days i'll follow you down i'll follow you down to the city yeah, it's been on my mind how everything we both love will be destroyed and on that night i won't see you again but i'm eternally grateful to have been your friend i'll never love so much as i have loved you now and just for one more night, we'll feel each other out all our fears are lifted all our wrongs forgiven and i have been so wrong i want to kill my past as we sing our favorite song all your doubts and all of mine will now be lost to the tides of time and as you're in my arms, we'll never break apart even for one more night, i'll hold you in my heart that's all that we have left it follows us to death if it all should die tonight i'll see myself in your golden light i'll follow you down i'll follow you down to where it all will break away and even on these final days i'll follow you down i'll follow you down we'll make the most of this dying world we have it all, we can't be deterred i'll follow you down i'll follow you down there's no more time for us to cry we've got each other and it's alright i'll follow you down i'll follow you down to the city let's see the city at night before it all burns down we'll see the city tonight and we will bring it back let's sing a glorious song we'll be where we belong until the city is gone let's bring the cities back let's build it brick by brick we only have tonight we've got to make it stick but if we fail this task it still can be alright we've still got you and i on this final night

about

everything has changed for me. this record plays like a collection of moments from the turbulence of the past few years of my life.

it isn't all so bad. i've fallen in love. i'm surrounded by people who care. but now more than ever i know how easy it is to lose everything.

there has been challenge after challenge. but there is so much to look forward to.

thank you for listening.

credits

released May 12, 2022

recorded December 2019 - February 2022

all songs written, produced, and performed by Dawn

cover art by Gaurang A.

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Dawn Rising Arizona

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formerly known as 404

check out my band, Vulgar Effect:

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